Fall Out of the Bee Sting

RIP kamikaze bee 7/10/14

Thanks you little suicidal rat bastard bee who thought my beach towel was a flower. I had a nice day after you stung me yesterday morning.

me: all those little bothersome breathing issues from a constricted chest and throat...gone. Ha!

me: finished the last 4 episodes of cult classic Freaks and Geeks on Netflix. In 1999, when it was on the air, I had 3 kids 4 and under. I was busy. It was niche programming before anyone understood that. Too bad.

bee: since it seems I've developed an allergic reaction to bee venom when I was last stung on a camping trip when I was 10, I have to see my doc and be allergy tested. Could end up having to haul around a bee kit for the rest of my life. I hate hauling stuff around. But I think I'd hate death by honeybee more. Sigh.

me: sting site? What sting site? I can barely find it. Ha!

me: totally amused my husband last night without trying because I'm such a wimp. Plus he took me out for an ice cream cone.

TALLY: me...4 bee...1

Making lemonade out of lemons.

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Can You Feel It?

I woke up with this particular bit of wisdom front and center, demanding attention this morning.

Grateful today for Maya Angelou's legacy.

xoxo

~Sherri

 

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Lemon Drop Martinis & Mad Men

Tonight the premier of the final season of Mad Men will hit my TV at 10pm. It's also Spring Break around here so guess who shouldn't have to get up early tomorrow morning? Me. But I will because my oldest, the 19 year old, is moving out...I will get up and share her joy in her independence. In preparation, and because I have a glorious abundance of Meyer Lemons, I will sip my perfected Lemon Drop Martini.

3 oz Absolut Citron Vodka

1 oz Grand Marnier

1 oz Simple Syrup

1 1/2 oz Meyer lemon juice

Mix in a shaker full of ice and pour into a chilled, sugar rimmed martini glass .

If you like yours a little more tart, just reduce the simple syrup ;)

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Stuffy. Sniffly. Sickie.

Still stuffed up. Still have the cold. And I still have bad aim.

 

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YOU rise and YOU shine!

Because I so do NOT!

Name the movie my title is quoting....win a prize.  Ring the bell.  Push the button, Max!  That's from the movie too.  It is Bill's all time favorite movie.  At least in his top 3.  And it IS pretty funny stuff.  You should watch it if you haven't.  You'll have to read to the bottom to find the movie name.  I'm demanding like that sometimes.

Are you a morning person?  Do you burst forth from your bed all smiles and perkiness?  Do you get your best work done before 10am?  Yes? Really?  Are you sure?  Because I think you've been brainwashed into believing you're a lark.

Fact:   Statistically, only 10% of the population are truly early risers.  Which means most of us are getting bossed around by these chipper rays of sunshine.  And they have somehow convinced all of us that it is better to be up at the Crack Of Dawn. 

Most weekdays I pry myself out of bed at the unmentionable hour of 5am.  I am not proud of this fact.  I am doing a disservice to all night owls.  I know and I apologize. 

I do this for the sake of my two oldest children.  Because, despite being trained since diaperhood of the evils of their very own father's early rising tendencies, they have willingly chained themselves and thus ME, to the public school starting hour of 7:45am.  If  I want to be the kind of mother who makes breakfasts and lunches and drives people around without incident at 7:20am, I have to get up while it's dark out.  That's the cold, ugly truth.

But there are requirements  I need Primo Joe.  2 cups.  Really hot and totally bionic.  I need a muffin.  And slightly under 2 hours of indulgent TV.  

That would be:  Peet's Coffee brewed nice and strong, ready and willing at 5am.
                         2 episodes of Mad Men (I've finished up my 7 year stretch with Nancy Botwin)
                         A Morning Glory Muffin.
                         A blankie.

So if you are like me, and require daily bribing to leave the snugly comfort of your fabulously more-perfect-in-the-morning-than-any-other-time-of-day bed, these muffins might make things a little less horrible at 5am.

I found this recipe on the world wide web and then of course substituted all the stuff I had for all the stuff I didn't have....and for healthy muffins they came out AWESOME!  So I'm thinking it's a pretty forgiving recipe and you can change it up even more depending on what is lurking in your pantry.

You will need -
18 muffin (cupcake) liners 
cooking spray
1 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup regular oats (I subbed quick oats because I had some left from another recipe and we don't like the quick ones for breakfast)
3/4 cup packed brown sugar
1 Tbs. wheat bran (I subbed wheat germ because oddly I had some stashed in the garage fridge)
2 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp. salt

1 cup plain fat-free yogurt (we had low-fat)
1 cup mashed ripe banana - about 2 bananas
1 large egg
1 cup chopped pitted dates (I subbed chopped prunes, we had them, don't ask)
3/4 cup chopped walnuts
1/2 cup dried pineapple (I actually bought these)
3 Tbs. ground flax seed - about 2 Tbs. whole (I totally skipped this, didn't have any and don't know where it lives at my grocery)

Preheat your oven to 350F

Place 18 muffin cup liners in muffin tins, coat liners with cooking spray.  Before baking if any of the muffin tins are left empty fill them 1/3 to 1/2 full of water so your muffins don't dry out.

Combine flours through salt in a large bowl and stir with a whisk.  Make a well in the center of the mixture.

In a separate bowl, combine the yogurt, banana and egg.  Add to the flour, stirring just until moist.  Fold in the dates, walnuts and pineapple (or your subs).  Spoon the batter into the lined muffin tins.  If you randomly had flax seed, sprinkle that on top of the muffins.  

Bake for 20 min.  Muffins are done when they spring back when lightly touched in the center.  Remove muffins immediately and cool on a wire rack.

Set your coffee maker for 4:45am.  Set your alarm for 5am.  Drag yourself out of bed, grab your blankie and shuffle to the kitchen.  Get your coffee and muffin, settle in on your sofa and watch, bleary eyed, 2 episodes of Men Behaving Badly Mad Men.

Then get on Netflix and request The Great Race so you can enjoy the antics of  Jack Lemmon, Natalie Wood and Tony Curtis being directed by Blake Edwards.

xoxo

~S

Well we saved her life...

...by showing up on time but you won't hear that sh-- on the news.

In my 44 years I've had friends, neighbors, parents of friends, speeding ticket issuers, etc. who also happen to be in law enforcement.  They are good, funny, hard working people (even the ones who've given me speeding tickets, because yes I was doing 55 in that 35 mph zone), who pretty much never get a big thank  you unless they get killed on the job.  It's just the way it is.  Wrong.  But true. 

Today my blog is a BIG HUGE THANK YOU!  And I'll tell you why.

Yesterday, while most of us were having a Tuesday, my friend (hi Judy!) was having her Monday.  It was a shiny new workweek, full of possibilities.  She's a police officer, and so in the last 20 years has seen and done all of things most of us hope never to have to see, touch, smell or fight off.  I've known her since we sat next to each other in 7th grade band.  She played the oboe and I was usually last chair clarinet.  I say usually because every once in awhile I would forget how much more fun it was to be last chair, goofing off with Judy, and accidentally practice a lot and get moved up to like, second chair.  At which time I would promptly quit practicing so I could be demoted back to last chair again.  Even then Judy had a scowl that could convince the Swanson brothers to let me out of the band locker they had put me in.  My kids, of course, think she's cool because she's always packin' heat and even without her field weapon could take even my 6 foot football player down.  Judy is the polar opposite of their mama and sometimes I think I should take some kick ass classes from her so I could get a little more respect around this joint.

But back to yesterday.  She and her fellow officers found a homeless woman on a mattress, in a field.  The woman was covered with ants and had foam coming out of her nose...still alive.  Because they showed up in time, they saved this woman's life!  Yet in Judy's own words...you won't see that sh-- on the news.  And it's a shame.

We get to hear all the bad stuff all the time.  And sure, there's a enough yuck to fill up an hour long news cast several times a day.  But I know there's also enough good stuff that could too.  Find the good news.  It's everywhere, lurking, waiting to make you smile!

So I humbly offer up my little blog, with it's tiny readership, to say THANK YOU  to Judy and all my other law enforcement peeps!!! 

xoxo,
~S 

High School Redo

I can now say with certainty that nobody should be really concerned with what they may have missed academically in high school. You will have plenty of opportunity to go over it again. And again and again. With each and every child you help with homework. For instance do you know what Golgi bodies are? Turns out I missed that in 1980 when I was a freshman. I missed it again a couple years ago when my oldest was a freshman and we were staying up late doing science definitions. But tonight, on round 3 of freshman science, I can confidently tell you that, a - they're a real, as in not made up, thing and b - they have something to do with cells. I can also confidently tell you that I have successfully gone through my adult life never once needing to know what a Golgi body is.



So high schoolers, enjoy your high school days. Don't wear yourself out because you can't remember every possible little piece of (mostly useless) information they are trying to cram into your head. Develop some people skills. A work ethic. Be a self motivated starter, a thinker, a solver of problems. Learn to respect a deadline, however ridiculous it may seem. These skills you will use every single day of your life. Your bosses will live you for it. And if you turn out to be a small business owner? Even better.

All that other random info you are being exposed to? It's important in that you need to figure out what piques your interest. That's the stuff you'll remember, study in depth in college, and, if you're fortunate, is what your career will center around. But Golgi bodies...unless it turns out that science, specifically, Golgi related science, rocks your world...don't stress about it.

Xoxo,
~Sherri,
Who still thinks the public school system could use a major overhaul but doesn't have any great ideas as to how to fix it.